I do realize it's been a month since my last post, but hey, I've been busy. I actually have a life now, one that's way more hectic and a tad... restricting sometimes, but at least it's not boring.
I am blogging on familiar territory, propped up on my bed back in my room (or at least what's left of it, since it technically now my sister's) in wonderful Indonesia :•) (That, ladies and gentlemen, is a clownface. Say hi to the lil' clownface! You'll probably see him a lot on this thing)
Anyways, I flew back just this morning, and with my busy schedule this month (I swear, my holidays are more tiring than school days) I was absolutely knackered by the time I got home and I should probably get some sleep, so I'll be quick.
As frantic and crazy as the couple of weeks have been, I have never felt so overwhelmed and fed up with everything but I've also never felt so... alive.
I've never felt so young.
There are the days when life decided to throw some 'bovine manure' your way, and then there are the days when life actually decides to be a little bit nice to you. And even when life's caught in between the two, you tend to realize that good things - the fun, friends, family, the chosen happiness - really can outweigh the bad.
Singapore has been a mixed bag of self-discovery and angst, complicated feelings but I guess the bottom line is that my time spent there is changing me. Whether for better or for worse, I can't really tell.
So to prepare for the upcoming school term and the rest of the year, I really need to focus and use my holiday as a chance to recuperate and grow, maybe pick up a skill or two.
The Off The Grid thing I did awhile back did wonders in helping me do that last year, so maybe I'll do something similar this time around :•)
But living in Singapore has also given me a sense of greater independence, a more profound sense of freedom. And though, frustratingly, it may not be as much as I want sometimes, I remind myself (or rather my annoying best friend does) that I'm only 16, I've got a full life ahead of me. I am still young after all.
I think most people have forgotten what being young really means, getting themselves lost in the fast-paced, modern world.
Being young means having free license to make mistakes, break some rules, go on adventures.
Fall in love.
Being young means being able to experience the world in its fullest splendor, with arms wide open at what to has to offer.
I know it sounds funny, that sometimes I actually have to remind myself that I am still young. But one of these days, that's gonna change. I'll start being truly and freely young.
I mean, it's not like I'm getting any younger.
-- Karin Novelia, A Bit Too Sleepy Now To Think Of A Catchy Tagline
